Monday, April 26, 2010

The Glamorous Life

ME (picking up a book Brooke has brought into the bar with her): “The Society of the Spectacle”? Sometimes I think you never want to get laid again.

BROOKE: It’s true. I think I hate straight men.

MIKE SQUARED: Raff, your boob is falling out of your dress.

ME: Thank you, Michael. You’re a good friend.

MIKE SQUARED: You tell me when I have spinach in my teeth, I tell you when your boobs escape! It's win/win.

MIKE 1: razumfrazumrazumfrazum…

JOHN: What are you saying? Is that a foreign language?

ME: He said, “This song has bongos in it. I like bongos.”

DREW (dancing by): Raff’s the only one who can understand Mike when he’s fucked up. She’s the Mike whisperer.

MIKE 1: mrfrzzngbiglle!

ME: Your fly is undone? I hadn’t noticed...

DREW: More shots! Happy birthday, James!

ME: James is at the other end of the bar, Andrew. Maybe you should slow down on the shots.

DREW: Shut up, Mary. Stop oppressing me! I will not be kept down!

ME (pointing to him): How can you not want a magical relationship like that in your life?

BROOKE: Tempting, soooo tempting…

MIKE: Brggrrifflemuck!

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Energy Vampire Redux

I received some very nice emails and facebook messages about the last blog, so thank you for that. Turns out many of us are thinking about new ways to deal with the energy vampire I described in the last blog. My mother, God bless her, reads my blogs regularly and had the following to say about it. I don't ordinarily share her emails so I hope she doesn't mind on this one, in this case it is information that I felt should be shared with my tiny reader-base. Plus I get the bonus of a brand new blog without actually having to write anything!
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I wanted to comment on your Energy Vampire blog. By the way, Eckart Tolle is working on a very high level, I am really happy you have found him.


I was taught about energy vampires this winter, and I will share with you what I learned.  It is all a matter of energy frequency. If you are resonating on the same  level as the other person, you are connected (energy entrains) and they can draw on your energy.  If you keep your energy field clear and filled with light, they cannot. I was told that this is the difference between sympathy (aligning with the others energy) and compassion (seeing the issue, offering help, but not aligning with it).

This is what happened to me: A man I know well who is a really bad alcoholic totally drained me twice. I could hardly walk out of X store
[Raffnote: she works in a new age book store doing readings]. Then he came into my reading room at X on another occasion, and I thought; "oh no, now what do I do?"  He tried every trick in the book to get me to align with him, he kept saying things like; "I am so bad, punish me, yell at me, I need help blah blah..."   All the while I was being guided to stay in a higher frequency. I said to him; "You know what you have to do, you know where the help is etc." and I never aligned with him. Finally he left, and the guides said that was the difference between sympathy and compassion.

People with powerful energy attract those who want and need energy.  More often than not, they are not really aware that they are doing it. Often these people are being guided by low beings from the other side that want some sort of chaos to evolve because they feed on that (guy at bank). This is all part of the lower energy.

Keep your energy field clear by seeing the Light flow out from your high heart (above your heart) into the physical body, then the emotional body, then the mental body, and finally the spiritual body.  Your whole energy field is then filled with light.  You can set up something with your Guides that when you say "Clear" they will help you clear.  I like to see a burst of bright light fill my energy field with the intention to clear.  This always keeps you in an energy that the lower frequencies cannot enter.  It doesn't mean you can't help someone who needs help, but you do it from your level and not theirs, that is you don't enter in to the drama  of the whole thing.

I am always aware of staying clear when in crowds etc.  or somewhere where the energy level is low.  A good way to work with someone like the bank guy would be to send him light as you stood there.  You would probably feel it hit a brick wall, but maybe not.

The energy on the planet is getting very high, we are becoming more and more sensitive to energy. Those of the lower energy are feeling it also and many are struggling for their survival. The "old" is going down, Yay.

Love, Mom


Sunday, April 4, 2010

Energy Vampires


I have been thinking a lot about energy vampires. Not so much the friends and family we all have that drain us with their crazy, that's do-able for the most part because you can hang up the phone. I'm thinking of those true vampires that you collide with out in the world that cause you to walk away feeling abused, twisted out, enraged, shaky, hurt, anxious, etc.

I am a magnet for psycho. If there is a lunatic in a room full of a hundred people and I'm sitting in the corner under an umbrella they will spot me. This is partially my doing as I am usually the first one to engage with the lunatic and tell them to shut the fuck up or stop shaking the baby or whatever seems appropriate at the time. I am overly empathic and tend to connect very quickly to whatever is going on in the room, plus I don't have much of a filter and carry a strong energy. So someone unable to manufacture their own energy/power will naturally drift in my direction to pull it or create a reaction. I'm sure many of you have experienced this phenomenon.

I am trying very hard in my maturity not to engage the crazy. When I see it coming I put my head down and swallow all of the retorts  that burble up and fight desperately to escape from my mouth. And sometimes I manage to escape unscathed. But it's difficult to know exactly what to do sometimes because I also don't want to be one of those New York assholes who stand there mute as some other innocent bystander gets abused by someone crazy or awful. Misanthropy aside, I am very much of the mindset that we need to take care of each other out there in the world. So I walk that tightrope between not wanting to risk expending energy and damaging my mood to still wanting to do the right thing.

Yesterday I was in the bank at the teller and there was a long line of five or six people behind me. The bank had a television on and Obama was speaking. The man at the very end of the line started shouting to his friend (who looked a bit like he got hijacked to this trip to the bank on the way to picking up his methadone) that he hates Obama, that Obama is a pig, that he would like to set Obama on fire, on and on and on and on. It was an aggressive and violent diatribe and the way he shouted out towards the back of people's heads clearly stated that his purpose was verbal assault. People in the line were uncomfortable but stayed silent hoping that he would run out of steam, but he just kept going. It was really disturbing.

I knew if I even looked at the guy he was going to come for me, so I kept on with my transaction and just gave the teller a look. After a minute or two no one could take it anymore and people started turning around and telling him to shut up. And then he went into "OH, SO I GUESS THIS ISN'T A FREE COUNTRY WHERE A MAN CAN SPEAK HIS MIND! MAYBE SOMEONE WOULD LIKE TO SHOOT ME." (Side-note, the man had an accent from one of the islands, so I don't even think he was from the U.S., but whatevs.) A woman with a toddler (who had been happily giggling moments before and was now looking scared) asked him to keep his foul language down, and he lit into her - "I HAVE A RIGHT TO MY OPINION!" And in her defense a very big man got more aggressive, telling him to SHUT UP in no uncertain terms, so the shouting turned down in volume to a more mumbled litany.

I remained silent but was fully engaged mentally and glared at the offender during this exchange. The big man behind me apologized as I left the window and I said, "No apologies necessary. It's him, it's not you." and then as I passed the asshole I said, "You are an incredibly rude man." To which he responded with more bitching about free speech, but I kept walking to a desk at the front of the bank.

As I continued my bank business I realized my hands were shaking. Then the rep helping me explained that the bank had fucked something up that would entail more paperwork and another visit, and I flipped out on her. I was so angry and said, "What are you talking about? What kind of moron would set my account up this way? I can't believe anyone would think this is good business!" That kind of thing.

She was very patient and sweet and said she would make some calls and try to fix the situation. And as I sat there waiting it dawned on me that I had completely mentally engaged with the asshole, given him my energy, gotten thrown off balance and now was transferring his negativity to the poor woman helping me. Maybe I was even sucking her energy now. This one awful person had purposely set off an entire room that was peaceful and cheerful moments before, completely shifting the mood to something dark, and he walked out satisfied while the rest of us dealt with our own emotional fallout. It was so horrible.

So I've been thinking about how a person goes about protecting themselves energetically from these kinds of vampires, and I remembered that I'd read about this in "A New Earth" by Eckhart Tolle. I highly recommend picking this book up, it's dry and slow reading but there is so much interesting information about ego and energy that it's kind of mind-blowing. 

He talks about remaining in "presence" and not having an attachment to the outcome of the situation, or to your own ego and "pain-body" need to control the situation, which will connect to that crazy person's crap on a subconscious level. There is an unconscious pain-body drive to engage, even if mentally you feel that you don't want to interact. I know this is true in my case, sometimes I can feel that there is a recognition with certain lunatics and that shit just clicks in, and we're off and running in a death struggle. I'm not the asshole (most of the time), but I still become part of the equation, even if it's just me walking away feeling shaky and upset.

I think the real key to self-protection happens when these people aren't even around, and has to do with making sure that we are in a happy, centered state in our lives, healing the pain and releasing old energy. Then these people can't find the trigger in us because it doesn't exist anymore. 

But I know this is easier said than done so I looked around online for information from Mr. Tolle that specifically addressed this situation. His message is much deeper than a simple step by step how to deal with being in a room with crappy people, so I didn't find anything that I could paraphrase for a blog. But I did end up spending a half an hour on youtube marveling at how so much information and entertainment is there for viewing. There are other people out there who address these situations as well--Dr. Judith Orloff is a good starter point, if anything I've written today resonates for you I would recommend checking her out as well. For today I thought I'd at least leave you with a ten minute snippet from Mr. Tolle that is not completely directed towards what I am talking about, but is still very interesting and does have to do with not connecting emotionally to scenes around us. I'm sorry the side of the video is cut off, blogger layouts and the huge side margins torment me.